By Matthew Terrell
Every summer a large red rash spreads over America. If you look at a heat map of the country, the South is America’s sunburned backside. Some people find the heat to be a nauseating inconvenience of Atlanta – it’s our payment for not having bone-chilling winters. I see the summer differently. The blazing heat is our reward for dealing with wet, gloomy Atlanta winters. When the thermometers stay above 90 degrees, I know I’m in heaven.
If you’re looking for something fun to do, whether it’s indoors in the air conditioning, at night or on the water, here’s a few options:
Nighttime Options
Crazy Bitch Bingo: Local entertainment guru Bryen Christopher (winsteadmedia.com) has turned bingo on its head with this raucous and racy game. It’s more than B9 and I16 — Crazy Bitch Bingo requires players to possess a vast wealth of knowledge of popular culture. The game happens weekly on the patios at Las Margaritas and Joe’s On Juniper. The perfect entertainment for a balmy evening.
Twilight Tours at Oakland Cemetery: Just as the sun sets, and just before the ghost of Margaret Mitchell rises for cocktail hour, visitors can enjoy a historic and haunted tour of Oakland Cemetery. Tour guides will offer historical stories of triumph, failure and civil unrest. oaklandcemetery.com
Air Conditioned
Helicopter Tour of Atlanta: Experience Atlanta traffic in a different kind of air-conditioned splendor. Air Atlanta Helicopters will fly you all over the metropolitan area. It’s a bit like being in a flying Ford Fiesta, but it’s cool. airatlantahelicopters.com
DeKalb Farmers Market: This is the most air conditioned place in the city. That’s because it’s actually refrigerated. Save this for when the heat is above 100, because DeKalb Famers Market is downright frigid. A long afternoon of snacking, shopping, and more snacking is a perfect escape from the realities of July. Not to mention all the interational edible oddities you could ever want are all within your buying power. dekalbfarmersmarket.com
On the Water
Shoot the Hooch: So many people have heard of this, but very few Atlantans have actually experienced the chilling waters of the Chattahoochee River firsthand. As long as you don’t go on a major holiday, a long afternoon tubing or canoeing down the Hooch’s is one of Summer’s most fun activities. shootthehooch.com
Learn to Sail: Put on your polo shirts and topsiders on and head to Lake Lanier for this most genteel of water sports. The Lake Lanier Sailing Academy offers both classes and sailboat rentals. laniersail.com