Cari Newman, a certified parent coach, certified life coach, and former classroom teacher in metro Atlanta, says it’s never too late to make a change when it comes to limiting technology.
Newman works with parents and caregivers of children from toddlers to young adults. Together, they identify challenges, create a strategy, and address issues head on. And that’s for all kinds of sticking points – from motivation to grades to technology.
“The work is focused on how parents navigate, stages, expectations, and shifts in the family dynamic while maintaining relationships,” Newman said.
When it comes to technology exposure or “screen time,” Newman said parents are fighting the very thing they’ve introduced to their kids. Parents question how to pull their child back from the fun content that they’ve become enamored with, she said.
“A lot of parents come to me with the assumption that it’s too late. They think, ‘You can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube,’” Newman said.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no screens before 18 months and one hour of high‑quality content daily for ages two to five. Screens shouldn’t replace sleep, physical activity, family time, or free play, AAP suggests. Device‑free bedrooms and mealtimes help to maintain healthy routines – which applies to all ages.
To address and change screen time exposure, it will take a parenting plan and the understanding that kids will resist. But Newman suggests parents think of social media like a newly discovered allergy, then adjust their approach.
“If you went to the doctor and said, ‘Hey, my child is having a reaction to tree nuts. This is new.’ Would the doctor say, ‘Oh well, you already ate almonds. Too late.’ No, you get new information and then you change what you’re doing,” Newman said.
Access to social networking
“Sometimes parents use technology as a babysitter. It makes total sense. We’ve all been there. But once you realize the babysitter is a vampire, you might want to look more closely,” Newman said.
There are some surprising places where unmonitored social networking can pop up with disastrous results. In elementary and middle school classrooms, Canva is used for book reports, comics, digital posters, photo collages and group projects. A Jacksonville, Fla., teacher was arrested in April for misusing Canva’s chat function to groom a student.
For an elementary schooler, the conversation looks like boundaries with room to mess up. Parents may agree to let their child use technology with a stated and agreed understanding of the rules.
“If they goof, which they will, because that’s part of what childhood is – finding the cracks, and where the child can push the limits – the parents’ job is to recognize a boundary has been crossed and reset. Tighten it up and try again in a couple of weeks, she advised.
Chat features are accessible in online games and systems including Roblox, Minecraft, Animal Crossing, Toca Boca, XBox, and Play Station. Newman also advises parents to monitor YouTube.
“Anyone with a drawing pad can put up an animated show, and if a kid has YouTube, who knows what they’re seeing,” she said.
Parents who play games with their kids are more present, which is an effective monitoring tool, Newman said, but there’s not always time. It’s more convenient to make dinner or throw in a load of laundry while kids are occupied with a game or show. Parents are exhausted.
“I completely understand when parents come to me and say, ‘This feels way too far gone because I let it go.’ I get it, and I have been there,” she said. “You can pull it back. That’s your prerogative and your responsibility as a parent.”
Resources
Newman wants parents to know they’re not alone. In addition to working with Newman to make a family plan, she recommends a few ways to reevaluate technology use.
First up is Savvy Cyber Kids. Owner Ben Halpert teaches online safety education for families and kids. Halpern has partnered with Chatperone, an AI chat platform that’s safe for kids.
Second is Ben Gillenwater at Family IT Guy. A cybersecurity expert, he runs an online course that walks people through iPhone settings.
Newman’s weekly newsletter is a helpful tool. She speaks at schools and organizations around metro Atlanta, and she’s writing a book.
“My role is to help parents figure out what they have the capacity for and what will work for their family,” Newman said. “They don’t have to start from scratch.”
