TimmyDaddy: Barley & Me

By Tim Sullivan

I did not have a dog growing up. I’d venture to say that with 10 kids in the house my parents felt there was a gracious amount of chaos already. Maybe that’s why, as an adult, I’ve never felt much of a pull towards getting a dog or any pet really.

When Kristen and I lived in Cabbagetown, where canines are so beloved, we were conspicuously dog-less. Going out for a walk sans dog almost seemed suspicious. I’d imagine people rushing to post on the neighborhood listserv that they just spotted an adult male/curly hair/mid 30’s/bouncing a tennis ball while walking through the park yet he had no dog…BOLO.

I do like most dogs, but I can be particularly averse to dog hair and certain dog smells and I’m not anxious to add those attributes to the household ambience. Not to mention that feedings, two or three walks a day and trips to the vet will make our already hectic schedules feel like we’re trying to catch the deluge in a paper cup (Prize to the first reader to catch the lyrical reference).

So imagine if you will what it has been like to, essentially, be a bystander in my own home as the dog ownership conversation between my wife and those crafty kids has steadily progressed. What started with “can we get a dog?” moved on to “if we get a dog…” to “when we get a dog…” without me offering as much as a peep. Sure, Kristen and I discussed it some in private and identified our hypothetical family pet. It would not be a puppy, maybe a two or three year old rescue dog. It would be medium in size. It would be great with kids and basically pretty chill. It couldn’t be too much of a shedder or a stinker or a barker. It should have only one eye.

Alright that last detail was tossed in after the fact, but Kristen’s sister, Kara, just up and adopted the exact dog we were hypothesizing about—Barley the one-eyed Lhasa Apso! He lost his other eye to surgery after an infection, but it just makes him that much more endearing. Kara lives nearby and brought him over to play one afternoon. Sure we fumbled over his name a good bit—Bailey, Barney, Charlie, Marley but he didn’t seem to mind. Everybody loved him, even me (a little bit).

Soon after, Kara had to leave town for a week and asked if we could take care of Barley. It was a test run of sorts. I wanted to know how quickly the kids would be bored with a dog (didn’t happen) or how much of a burden the caretaking would be (not much). I braced myself for the indoor accidents and furniture damage and actually there was some of that. He scratched up a leather sofa in the basement and was so excited one day when I got home from work that he peed on my shoe. But those are the types of things my kids are capable of, too, so why hold Barley to a higher standard, right?

Perhaps my views on dog ownership are evolving, but he had really not overstayed his welcome when Kara returned from her trip and took him home. I’m not weeping over here or anything, but it was pretty nice having the little guy around. At the same time, maybe he’s enjoying the quiet and calm of Kara’s house after a week of living at Grand Central Station? Hard to say, but I think he sort of enjoyed himself, running circles around the kids in the backyard, marking about 37 different spots on each walk, sleeping under Elliott’s bed.

I should probably run this by Kara first, but what does everyone think of shared custody of a dog? Is that a thing? People do it successfully with children, can we do that with Barley?

Tim Sullivan grew up in a large family in the Northeast and now lives with his small family in Oakhurst. He can be reached at tim@sullivanfinerugs.com.